Tired.

My aunt passed away late Monday night.  I got home from work on Monday and my mom informed me that my other aunt had called and said that her older sister was in the hospital. She had called 911, been taken in, and they found out she had cancel throughout her entire body. No one knew. I don’t know if she knew, or if she purposefully hid it from the family.  Her father died of cancer a couple of years ago and it was a several year long terrible, painful, exhausting process that she may not have wanted to put the family through a second time.  Tuesday morning my dad informed me that his sister had called that morning to say my aunt had passed in the night.

I am sad, more for my father who lost a sister than anything else, and so soon after losing his father to cancer and his step mother to old age and dementia. I didn’t know my aunt very well, I saw her almost every summer growing up, but by around age 12 or so until now I maybe only saw her half a dozen times for brief visits.

She and I were a lot alike however. Not just in appearance—us both being morbidly obese, and both having very similar facial features (that run in the family, all women on my father’s side look very much the same)—but also in our lifestyles. She was single her entire life, I’m not sure she ever had a boyfriend (or girlfriend) ever. She lived alone. I went to college as a history major because I dreamed of being a teacher like her. I think the only reason I ended up not doing that was because I realized that at least in the state I was in I needed an education degree, not history. Also, history required language credits, which I failed miserably at.  Sometimes I still consider trying to be an English teacher. But it was from her that I got the desire to teach at an early age, even if it never panned out.

I regret that I didn’t talk with her more, that I didn’t seek advice from her on how to become a teacher, that I never got to know her better. I felt the same way after Grandpa passed, regretting that I didn’t spend more time with him, learn from him, ask him about his life.

Another way my aunt and I are alike, she didn’t want a funeral. She didn’t want her family to gather together and lament her passing. She wanted to be cremated, buried in the family plot, and then sometime later to have a celebration of life, a happy occasion to remember the good things. That’s what I would want too.

This week has been long, and tiring. I’ve not felt like sleeping until midnight or 1 am, so I’ve been exhausted at work. I am having trouble focusing on anything, and want nothing more than to just lay down and sleep. I can barely keep my eyes open. I think tonight I may go to bed early. My eyes feel tired, but more than that my mind feels tired, like it doesn’t want to think.

I haven’t been playing wow this week because I haven’t felt like actively using my brain. Instead I’ve been watching the marvel movies in order of release. Last night I watched Guardians of the Galaxy and Age of Ultron. Tonight I’ll watch Ant Man and Civil War, and then Friday night I’ll watch my favorite, Doctor Strange.  When Guardians 2 and Spiderman are out, I’ll watch those as well. Guardians 2 comes to Amazon in a little over a week.

I will get back to playing WoW probably this weekend, after I’ve had time to rest and don’t feel so lethargic.  I’m eager to start leveling my monk. I’ve watched a few videos on Brewmaster tanking and apparently it is different, and interesting, and that WindWalker is also very fun to play.  I stupidly got Mistweaver as my first weapon and need to get to level 102 before I can pick up a different one. It’s making leveling a challenge, one that would be less painful with flying. So I’ll probably get on with Khadon, do my world quests to farm my rep needed, then switch to my monk and start questing.

113499717-main

Here is my monk currently. I’m not sure if I will RP her. I need to do some transmog collecting though because that uglyness was the best I could do with what limited monk gear I have so far.

Eventually I want to get all the classes I enjoy up to 110. I’ve got Druid and Priest so far, Monk will be next, and then Shaman and Paladin. I have a hunter but I doubt I’ll level it up. I only got it to tame the rare Cataclysm pets which aren’t really a thing anymore so my desire to play it is gone. The only reason I still have it is all the work I put in to farming those rare pets.

My rogue, mage, demon hunter and warlock will probably stay deleted. I may however make a warrior, a class I’ve never really played or given a chance. I’ve never made a Death Knight either but have zero interest in them at all, the only class I have less interest in than DK is rogue.

So once I’ve got Druid, Priest, Monk, Shaman and Paladin to 110, I may make a warrior and give it a try.

Some things I also want to do is farm transmogs for all my favorites, especially my monk. I also want to on one of my characters (monk maybe since she has the most done already) go back and do all the quests and zones of all the old content, farm up all the achievements I can unlock, and get professions all to max on those characters.

Professions are:

Druid: Skinning/Leatherworking
Priest: Enchanting/Tailoring
Monk: Mining/Jewelcrafting
Paladin: Blacksmithing/Engineering
Shaman: Herbalism/Inscription
Warrior: None

I figure my Pally can do two crafting professions because my monk can mine for everything, as my Monk may become my main if I like it more than my druid (though Khadon will remain my RP character).

Khadon’s professions are maxed. my Priest’s are close but still need work. Paladin is currently skinning/leatherworking so I’ll need to start from scratch. Monk is around 600 so has work, and Shaman is currently no professions so will also have to start from scratch.

I am not an end-game player, so instead of trying to raid and such, I can spend my time doing all this old content and casual stuff just to be a completionist.  I’ll probably see if my alts can all join the guild so even if I’m not on Khadon I can know what’s going on. But I suppose I could just be in discord.

The coffee/hot cocoa I drank is finally starting to kick in. I think I may actually be mentally able to get some work done, so I’ll finish up this rambling post with a health update. I’ve been doing okay staying under my calories. I slipped up a bit yesterday because we had donuts I work. I’ve learned that if I cheat once I am more apt to cheat again that day, and use the fact that I already screwed up as an excuse. It’s a matter of building momentum. It’s also a matter of having healthy low calorie snacks on hand. I think I’ll get some carrots when I go grocery shopping tomorrow, as well as more jellos. And I may also pop a a bag of popcorn on sunday and split it up into little baggies to take to work as a snack, and do the same tuesday for the next couple of days etc. (People complain about the smell of popcorn when I cook it at work).

If I can stock my fridge at work with healthy snacks I’ll be less likely to go to the vending machine. 50 calories of popcorn is better than 250 calories of doritos, and of course I never get just one thing at the vending machine.

Time to attempt to work!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s