It’s been a while since I’ve given a legit weight loss update. A few days ago I went back down under 300. I had been under 300 a few months ago, but gained around 10 pounds over the holidays, lost it in time for my birthday, then gained the 10 back. So it’s been quite a rollercoaster. And of course, gaining weight back feeds the self loathing and depression. But I’ve managed to persevere.
I’ve been more and more able to take my failures in stride. If I fall off the wagon and over eat one day, I tell myself it’s okay, it wont ruin all my work. I don’t want to be too lenient on myself, but gaining a pound or two isn’t going to kill me, so long as the long road is generally resulting in overall weight loss.
I dipped back under 300 a few days ago and vowed I would never see a 3 in front of my weight ever again. There was some shakiness there where I went up to 299 and I feared the worst. Despite a little bit of overindulgence at my Grandmother’s Sunday, I have managed to get back in control. My scale this morning said 296.4.
That is 44 total pounds lost from when I started last summer, and 11 pounds lost since I started counting calories in February. (Of course that doesn’t count the around 20 pounds I regained and relost…).
It has become easier and easier to say no to junk food and to say no to snacking, or else to snack more healthily. Yesterday I was over 400 calories under my 1570 limit, and I didn’t feel starved or unsatisfied. It is becoming routine. I had a breakfast bar (140cal) on my drive to work, and when I get to work I make myself a hot cocoa (90cal) that is half water and half black coffee (30cal) —yup, it’s happened. I’ve started drinking coffee, but just 1/2 a cup a day in my hot cocoa. But that’s how it starts!
Then I have my Healthy Choice steamer for lunch, which is generally around 250 calories, sometimes less, sometimes more, but never more than 290 calories. So by lunch time I’ve still got over 1000 calories. Around 2 or 3 in the afternoon I’ll have a snack. Sometimes carrots (70cal) sometimes some jerky from the vending machine (which I need to stop getting because even though its only 90 calories, its $1.50 for like 6 small pieces of jerky). Depending on my lunch and depending on my snack I usually have between 800 and 1000 calories when I get home from work.
My biggest probably is when I get home from work. I’ll stand in the kitchen and chit-chat with my folks and munch on chips, or a couple slices of cheese, or a couple pieces of deli meat, and wont think much of it. Yesterday I did good, I got a 5 calorie jello cup and slowly ate that while I chatted with mom. That held me over until dinner.
I’ve gotten better about logging dinner. It’s still too much of a hassle to measure out servings when it’s a home cooked meal, so I try and guess. Mom has gotten better about leaving packages out for me to scan. I then eyeball the serving size and try to take what I am very sure is less than a serving. I took the smallest porkchop last night, and if it is true that 4 ounces of meat is about the size of the palm of your hand (or the average hand I assume. Mine is smaller I am sure) then I took less than 4 ounces because it was a tiny pork chop. I always take a piece smaller than my palm.
For the veggies, carrots and spaghetti squash, both of them had like almost a full cup as a serving, so I just made sure I took less than I felt would be a cup. I could be over there but even if I am both are such low calories it wouldn’t matter. My dinner yesterday was 241 calories, so even if I was way off and doubled that, I’d still have ended the night with over 300 calories under my limit.
I then end the night with a bag of 100 calorie popcorn while I watch an episode of a show if I have one available, or read if I don’t. Yesterday I had almost 600 calories left, but I didn’t go to bed feeling hungry or unsatisfied. I went to bed feeling good about myself. And that good feeling has traveled over to today, and will make it even easier to say no to stuff I shouldn’t.
The trouble will still be D&D, and also going over to family. Tuesday D&D isn’t so bad, it doesn’t go as late and people don’t bring snacks. But Friday D&D is always full of donuts, candy, cookies, etc. I need to get better about saying no in those situations. Family events again are another story. My grandmother cooks such wonderful food, most of it with real butter, sugar, shorting, etc. No calories or carbs are lost when Grandma cooks. And there are always so many different dishes to try.
In most cases dinner with my folks is a meat and a vegetable and a starch (potatoes, pasta), or a meat and 2 choices of vegetables when they are trying to be healthy. At grandmas there are usually 3 different veggie options, and those aren’t just frozen peas, but green beans cooked with onions and bacon, or peppers fried in the grease from the meat. There are usually potatoes, and some kind of potato or pasta salad, and then the meat. And don’t forget bread, usually home made, and dessert which is always an affair. Then there are various sides you can’t really define, like her favorite jello fruit salad which is not a dessert but served with dinner.
So, going to Grandma’s for dinner is usually a lost cause. I try to limit my food intake leading up to it, going to Grandmas with at least 1200 calories if I can. Even then I tend to take small tiny little one or two bite servings of everything, so I can taste/try everything without overloading. But bread and pasta are my weaknesses, and I usually take seconds.
But I don’t eat dinner over there too often, maybe once a month if that. More during the holiday season. So I should be okay indulging there on occasion provided I behave the rest of the time. And that is the key, behaving the rest of the time.
Again, though, my current success has made it increasingly easier to continue to succeed. I look forward to each little goal, which is every 10 pounds. 299, 289, 279, 269 and so on. My next major goal is 240 as that means I’ve lost 100 pounds! After than is the onederland goal of 199, followed by the major goal of 140. That wont necessarily be my end weight, but I figure I’d work towards getting there and see how I look, see if I want to weigh less. I am 5’2″ so the websites say I should weigh between 104 (yeah right!) and 135, so 140 is still technically overweight. But its also a perfectly round 200 pounds lost so is still a major goal even if I chose to continue.
When I get down into the 100s I think I may want to take up a more active hobby. I am debating between something like kayaking and some kind of martial arts (akido is the one I’m leaning towards). Though I hesitate about martial arts because most classes are like little kids. It depends on if I want to take classes with toddlers, or if I can find adult only classes. I also want to work on my archery.
The biggest one however is horseback riding. My current dream is to park my tiny house on a small horse farm, one with 3-6 horses. I’d offer to muck stalls, feed and turn out in exchange for rent, and possibly in exchange for stabling my own horse there. I’d of course have to get a horse first! But once I’ve got my tiny house, and paid off my student loan, and am living debt free, I’ll basically be making almost 2 grand a month with almost no bills to pay. I’d have no problem keeping a horse even if I had to pay room and board.
I want a gypsy vanner, but they tend to be a bit expensive. we’re talking 12,000 to over 20,000. I also decided I want either an australian shepherd or a brittney spaniel. I’ve always ever gotten dogs from the pound, and I certainly advocate that. There are so many unwanted dogs. But I also really want one that is known for being a loyal breed, and one that is good around horses, because I would love to be able to go on trail rides and have my dog come with me without a leash. Australian Shephards are considered one of the best dogs for that. The likelyhood of finding one in a pound is slim, and especially if I want a puppy that I can raise to be around horses.
Now I’ve gotten off on a tangent again. Getting back on track, my weight loss is going well. I am not doing much in the way of exercise, and that’s okay, because counting calories is working for me. I am doing small things to be more active. I park very far away both at work and when I go shopping, and walk to wherever I am going. It’s about 400 steps at work, and about 600 or so at Walmart. I also make sure I only buy enough that I can carry it without a cart, so I walk the whole way back to my car carrying 4-6 grocery bags.
I also make sure I go downstairs to fill up my water bottle or to use the bathroom, rather than using the fountain or bathrooms near my office. I also have a stand-up desk, and especially since I broke the foot ring around my stool I am trying to stand more, because I don’t want to break my stool constantly getting off and on it. So I sit for maybe 2 hours a day and the rest I stand. 30 minutes in the morning sitting, an hour at lunch, and 30 minutes in the afternoon.
So while I am not getting a solid 30-40 or more minutes of legit exercise, I am trying to be more active than I used to be. I average around 4000-5000 steps a day. I can go almost to 10k when I go for a walk at lunch, but I haven’t been doing that lately. But before when I didn’t have a stand up desk, and when I parked near the door, I’d get like 2000 steps a day. On weekends if I don’t make myself get up and move I’d get less than 1000 a day.
I am doing well. I’m feeling good about my progress. I’ve lost 11 pounds since february, so thats about 5 a month, which is a tiny bit over a pound a week. But that’s because I was cheating and not doing quite as well as I would like. I’ve lost about 4 pounds in the last 2 weeks, so at least recently I am getting the 2 pounds a week I set up MyFitnessPal for. And as I said, the success makes it much easier to keep at it, and to continue that success. I’ll do a full weightloss update again in about a month, see where I am. 🙂