A lot of shit is going on in my life right now. Or at least it will be going on, I am in a current feeling of treading water waiting for things to actually happen. But happen they will.
I am saving up to build a tiny house. That is still the dream. I’ve decided on the model. When the time comes I will purchase the plans to build The Cypress myself. If you follow that link you will see a handful of floor plan options. I like the Overlook the best, though I will change a few things.
I am also working to lose weight. I am 300lbs as of this morning. Last summer I was 338. So I’ve lost a good amount, almost 40 pounds, already. I’ve still got over 150 pounds left to lose, but I am doing well and feeling really good about it. I feel like I am actually going to succeed this time.
I am also seriously looking into transitioning, ftm, but this is one that I want to take a lot more time to consider. It is actually coming at a great time, because as I lose weight I will need to replace my wardrobe anyway. When I am able to get clothes in my size at Walmart and Goodwill and Target, (cheap places that don’t charge $30 for a pair of pants) then I can begin augmenting my wardrobe with more masculine clothes.
Mine will be a slow transition. I think that too will work to help ease family/friends/coworkers into it. They will see me slowly start dressing more like a guy, and when the time comes to actually take the more drastic measures (testosterone, top surgery) it wont come as a shock.
I am currently looking around for gyms. When I get down to around 280 or so I think I would like to join a gym and see a personal trainer once or twice just to get a good idea of what I need to do. I’m choosing a gym when I have a perfectly functional treadmill at home because I don’t just want to lose weight, I want to build muscle. And not just the “oh you’ll build muscle as you lose weight from doing these normal weight-loss exercises” but actually bulk up.
Sadly there aren’t any gyms really close to me. The closest one is an Anytime Fitness that is somewhat on the way home from work if I sort of detour the long way. I’ll have to check it out when the time comes, see if they have weight machines and personal trainers and the like.
So I say 3 year plan, that’s because it’ll take me until probably the first month or two in 2018 to save up to buy the trailer for my tiny house, so about a year from now. After that I’ll build it as I can afford to, but I’m thinking it’ll end up costing around $12-15 grand in materials, and that will take me at the very absolute least 15 months to afford, so almost a year and a half. To give myself some cushion I’ll say 2 years. So we’re looking at 3 years before I’ll have my tiny house finished. (2020 will apparently be my year).
I’m not sure when in that timeline I’ll begin with the physical aspects of transitioning, I may decide before then not to go through with it (one of the good parts of not just running out today and getting on hormone shots). So much in my life is going to be changing and I want to do it right. I don’t want to rush anything, or force anything.
I also, though I love my current job and the people I work with, want to look towards my future and what I actually want to be doing with my life. I know I want to write, but I’ve also been wondering about animation. I don’t have the money for actual classes, but youtube is a vast ocean of free tutorials on almost anything you want to learn about. And there are free animation software out there. I don’t know if I want to do video game animation or movie animation. I’m not a good enough artist to do like 2-d drawing my own stuff, but I am wondering if my talents at sculpting might transition to 3-d digital art and animation.
I’m also interested in graphic design in general. So I want to look into all of that. I do however want to spend my time writing. So I’ve decided to make a tumblr. This tumblr will have my artwork and sculpting and my writing, fictional writing. It wont be a blog, I won’t blog on it, that’s for here. But it will give me a venue for my art. I want to challenge myself to post on it every day, either writing or art of some sort.
I’ll post a link when I’ve made it. 🙂